Happy 2019 everyone!
I’m not the sort of person to write new years resolutions each year, because I’m also not the type of person who is going to stick to them. However, after the roller-coaster of 2018, I wanted to make a few “plans” for 2019 and stick to them. So here goes.
Travel more. – This doesn’t necessarily mean go far, or even venture out of the United Kingdom but I have lots of online friends from all over England and Scotland that I would love to visit. Travelling on my own has never particularly scared me. 99% of my past relationships have been long distance so the thought of going through London on my own isn’t as worrying as it could be for a lot of people. In fact, I enjoy it. I love bringing my laptop on long journeys, settling down with my headphones and a Harry Potter book that I’ve read hundreds of times. Nevertheless, I have so many internet friends that I am yet to meet or haven’t seen for years; people that I speak to on a daily basis through a screen but that mean an awful lot to me. Even simply to visit a family member would be a great plan for my 2019.
Work on my trust with my girlfriend.- Now, don’t get me wrong, I trust my partner more than anyone on this planet, but I am the sort of person who needs constant reassurance. If I plan a date, I will constantly worry that she isn’t enjoying herself. If she’s a bit quieter than usual, I’ll worry that I’ve done something wrong. I swear, I’m that girl who will ask her on our wedding day if she definitely loves me. Time to show her I love and trust her as much as she does to me.
Make more of an effort with my “IRL” friends. – I tend to go through stages where I’ll see my friends a good few times a week, but then I wont see them for another month because my head shuts down and I don’t want to see anyone at all. Most of my friends have their own lives now, a good percentage of them have babies and are getting married in the next couple years. I want to be a part of that, see what my friends get up to in their lives and play an active role with them.
Me, me, me. – This is probably, for me, the most important of all my plans. In 2018, there were several times when I let myself sink into a pretty deep slump. Starting 2019, I felt myself sinking again which was scary; I didn’t want to spend this year the same way that I started last year. I want to be happy. I want to go back to my doctor and my counsellor and simply get things sorted in my head. Look after myself a lot more. Do things that make me happy. Don’t take on extra work if it jeopardises my own wellbeing in the long term. Just be kind to myself.
I hope you enjoyed my first blog post of 2019. There will 100% more blog posts coming up in the future – as soon as I can decide where I want my blog to go and what I want to be doing with it.
For now, make 2019 your year. In fact, make every year your year. Be kind to yourself and do the things that scare you. You got this. For 2019, take control.